Money Flinch. That moment when something around money makes you tighten, avoid, overthink, justify, or say yes when you mean no.

Possibly the biggest money flinch of my coaching career happened a long time ago, when I opened my calendar. Shoulders up, eyes squinting, head slightly turned away from the computer because I didn’t want it to be true.

This would be a good time to be wrong.

Click, open, f**k…it’s true.

Evening calls stacked up throughout the week. I had recently raised my rates and I knew before saying yes to all of these evening calls that I shouldn’t but there was this voice that kept chiming in, ‘but they’re paying more’.

That voice? Classic money flinch.

To be honest, as a coach it’s hard to compare value sometimes. We aren’t selling widgets with fixed deliverables.

How I spend my money is careful and deliberate. I over-research, overthink, and if I’m being really honest, I’m sometimes too scared to spend any of it at all. So when I raised my rates, I started asking myself the worst possible question: would I pay for me?

Funny thing is, I have invested in plenty of things that someone else could look at and wonder what the ROI would be. For me, though, the returns have been lifelong.

S Factor pole dancing led me to becoming an instructor and eventually owning my own studio. Not only did I have so much fun, it opened a doorway into expressing myself and helping others express themselves too. I could keep going.

Here’s the thing, I knew I could change someone’s life. What I wasn’t sure about was whether I was there yet.

I was comparing myself to coaches who had been at that price point for a while. They were seasoned. I was just arriving.

What I forgot is that they had to start somewhere too.

At some point, every coach has to have a real conversation with themselves about money. Including me. I’ve been on my own now for approximately four years. What do I want to charge? Why do I want to charge that? When will I know it is time to raise my rates? What do I want my business to support? What kind of life am I actually trying to build?

I do not think there is one rule for this. Some people may review their rates every year. Some every other year. Some after more experience, more training, stronger demand, or hitting a goal they set for themselves.

But if you have never really had that conversation with yourself, you will keep looking to your clients to answer it for you. And that usually does not go well. Because when you are unclear with yourself, you become more negotiable with everybody else.

So let me ask you.

Have you raised your rates? Are you thinking about it? Are you still coaching for free because you’re being ‘nice’ or still ‘practicing’ as a new coach?

Or perhaps you’re further along. You haven’t raised your rates in years and don’t know how to justify the jump. You have long-term clients and you’re afraid to have that conversation with them. You’ve raised your rates but find yourself over-justifying or apologizing before you even ask.

The flinch that happens before anyone even pushes back.

In the end, is that flinch really about money?

Here’s my invitation. Face your flinches. Sit down with yourself before the moment arrives. Decide in advance what your plan is. What goal do you need to hit before you raise your rates? What will that number be when you do?

Because when you know the answers before someone asks, you won’t need to justify anything.

This exact Money Flinch came up in our last Practice Lab with our Insiders and we built a tool around it. If you’re already inside, it’s waiting for you. If you’re not yet, this might be a good time to change that.